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My Highlight Reel
Soon after I began blogging, I stumbled upon a blog, immediately falling in love. I watched from afar, too afraid to actually comment, but I liked her. A lot. She was cute. She was funny. She was … quirky. Later I found her on Instagram, and my admiration grew into a full on girl crush. This chick was bad ass … ahem … I mean, this chick is bad ass, and it’s my privilege to introduce Quirky Chrissy here on this fabulous site where women support women and we highlight bad ass quirky chicks. ~Mandi
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Recently, I’ve been overwhelmingly praised for my confidence. For inspiring other women. For sparking a change in their lives. For helping them feel more comfortable in their own bodies. For being a rebel. For being fat when fat isn’t considered beautiful by the media. By men. By other women. For wearing less clothing than a chubby girl should. For showing off my curves (and my rolls). For not doing what is expected of me. For wearing a bathing suit. In public. And taking a picture.
For that praise, I am immeasurably grateful. To be referred to as an inspiration is incredibly humbling. And certainly not something I ever expected to be. But it makes me want to be better. It makes me want to try harder. I want to be an advocate for people to feel comfortable in their skin when they need to most. To put on a bathing suit and go to the pool with your children, to relax on a beach with the love of your life, to wear shorts when the weather is sweltering, to be in the pictures instead of just taking them.
If posting a picture of my yoga body, neither long nor lean, lithely moving in one of my beloved pairs of bright and colorful pants can encourage someone to step on their mat every morning, I’m all in. I’m proud of the things my body can do. And it’s more than I could do seven months ago. And not as much as I’ll be able to do seven months from now. My body is strong.
If sharing a carefully posed image of myself in a two-piece bathing suit pushes someone to strut their stuff on the beach, then by all means yes! I’m your girl. I bought a two-piece bathing suit because I was inspired by others, and it made me feel fucking amazing.
But don’t-not for one second-believe that my highlight reel is anything more than your daily existence.
I fight with myself every day. To be the confident girl you see in pictures. To be the highlight reel. And some days, even if it’s only for a minute, I’m that girl. Other days, I’m insecure girl. I’m change-my-clothes-five-times girl. I’m stare-in-the-mirror-and-project-hate girl. I’m paranoid girl. Are they looking at the way my boobs pop out of my shirt? Is he staring at the cellulite on my thighs in these shorts? Is she watching me eat this cheeseburger and thinking what a fatty I am? Do they think I’m disgusting? They’re staring at me, right?
90%* of the time, the answer is NO. It’s all in your head. The other 10%* of the time? Assholes. Go ahead and judge them right back. Or don’t. And be the bigger person.
Do I love myself? Fuck yes. I think I’m fantastic. Most of the time. Do I look at myself in the mirror and think I’m beautiful? Sometimes. It’s all a part of who I am. I like to think if I loved only myself all the time, I would be a complete asshole who didn’t care about others. Who couldn’t empathize or sympathize. I’d be a robot.
Instead, I choose to spread love. And kindness. And passion. To support my friends and join them on their beautiful journeys. To live and love unabashedly with my boobs and cellulite and cheeseburgers.
Does that mean I’ll always be happy with my body the way it is? Probably not. If given the opportunity to have liposuction or a tummy tuck, would I take it? Absofuckinglutely. But…that doesn’t mean I’m going to sit on my ass waiting for it under several layers of clothing while I hide behind my computer.
Instead, I’m going to create a highlight reel.
*I mathed in a fictitious land called, “Chrissy’s World” and make no promises as to the accuracy of any numbers used in the making of this post.
Christine Wojdyla is an award-winning writer and humorist, sometimes pairing the two as she would her favorite bottle of cheap wine and expensive cheese. She writes at her personal, no-niche, full-nonsense blog, Quirky Chrissy, where you’ll find her passionately raving about cheese, her hilarious boyfriend, and that one time (or twenty-seven times) she fell down. You can also spot her practicing yoga on Instagram or sharing random and ridiculous thoughts on Facebook and Twitter.
That’s a beautiful way to start the week! Thank you so much for sharing this post! 🙂
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Thank you for reading it! ❤
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You are lovely and courageous, darling! We can’t let the haters keep us from living our lives. Especially not if the hater is us. 🙂 does that make sense? It’s early, I need coffee….
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It totally makes sense. And you’re spot on. Want to share your coffee?
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Absolutely amazing post, Chrissy! I love the confidence you project over social media and your sense of humor and yes, I think your pictures and your voice go a long way to inspire but that has never been what I notice about you. Your light shines.
I am glad to know that you aren’t a robot and you fight the same internal fight most of us do. I am the same. Some days I look at myself and say, ‘Yeah..not bad for 47.’ Other days, I just walk away and hope for the best. It is what it is. I blame menopause.
I am proud to say that I know you even a little. Everywhere I look there it is. That light. May it keep on shinin’!
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Sandy, you’re going to make me cry. Thank you for being so sweet. I think it’s important to see the highlight reel for what it is, and I don’t want to give off the impression that anyone is anything more than anyone else. We’re all special.
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Desperately needed to read these words this morning. Thank you for kicking my ass in the nicest way possible.
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Anytime you need an ass-kicking, I’m here.
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Love this. Love you. Love that amazing bathing suit! (Polka dots, yo.) And the skinny girl watching you eat that burger might just be marveling at your confidence. Not because she doesn’t think you should have that confidence, but because she wishes she could channel some of that mojo herself. Jes’ sayin’.
As I tell my girls, you’ve gotta love the skin you’re in.
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I totally have a thing for polka dots. And cheeseburgers.
And you make a really great point. Thank you.
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–All I can say is:
you. are. beautiful.
and inspiring.
Love from Duluth, MN. xx
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Thank you. So so much.
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I love this and admire your chutzpah. Well done 🙂
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No one’s ever told me I had chutzpah before. 😀 Thanks!
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It struck me as a very appropriate word.
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Oh hell yeah… except for the intro… which states that this is a place where women support women… because men are just chopped liver… sniff… (and HA!!!)
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Oh piss off. You know we support men as well.
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well, I meant that WE support you as well… but I take your point… and I am now pissing off… but I am doing it standing up!!! HA… I really do kill me… oh man…
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Mhmmm you backtrack all you want buddy. Just don’t pee down your leg as you go :p
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I… oh man… dang it…
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Sexist pigs.
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Well Art while we love you and men in general:
Women tend to tear other women down all too often. One of the things we are super proud of is that the women who make up the sisterwives LOVE building other women up so I love Mandi’s intro but…
We are also happy to have so many men supporting us in our endeavor to do just that. We are lucky to have men who respect the women here.
So dry your little tears and know you matter 🙂
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yay
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Art, come on. You know you’re supported here, too. I recently decided that I needed to start a movement where women quit being assholes to each other and instead build each other up. I guess I channeled that in my intro. Don’t be sore over it. I need you back on the MandiCave soon, unless you’re going to be all pissy and not come back.
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I am just giving you a hard time… because humor is what I do… I didn’t really take it the wrong way… I didn’t really piss on my own foot either… really… I didn’t…
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Chrissy! Chrissy! Chrissy! You know how much I adore you and I LOVE your *twinklysparkly* yoga all over instagram. I often wish I was flexible like you, and I know you say it’s all in the warm-up but I think I’m just too impatient and will stay bulky and inflexible 🙂 Thank you SO MUCH for writing for us and sharing your indomitable spirit. You’re awesome – you ooze confidence and it works – it’s very attractive, and everywhere I turn, people have only high praise for you 🙂
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Thank you for sharing this! Stuck at an airport for 6-1/2 hours last night, I wrote – and deleted- and wrote again. You see, I viwed to wear my suit proudly at the beach. I felt awesome.
And them my MIL’s partner showed the DVD he had already compiled from the trip and I saw myself onscreen. I looked like that???
And here I sit, struggling with how I felt and how I feel now. And your posts have been an inspiration for me this summer.
So thanks for the kick in my apparently wider-than-I-thought ass. Yes, that post is still being worked but…with a little less whine.
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It’s kind of a paradox. You like the way you look, so you wear the outfit/suit/whatever. Then you see a picture, or a video, and it makes you cringe, because that’s not what you saw – but other people don’t see what you see in that picture. What they see is closer to what you saw that you liked in the first place. (wow. I may still need coffee to sort that out.) Wear your suit! I’m sure that you are lovely! 🙂
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OMG YES! All the time. I’ve wanted to burn pictures because my chubby arms are sticking out of tank tops or you can see the round of my stomach, even though I thought I looked good, and felt good about what I was wearing. But That Shameless Hussy totally nailed it. The other people don’t see what we see. They see what we felt.
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Your word made me cry and if I am honest it isn’t the first time. I went to the pool with my daughter this weekend and I was embarrassed because I was the biggest mom there. In this case my daughter trumped my insecurity and I swam with a smile on my face. I made a comment to a neighbor about how uncomfortable I really was and he said, “hey but your being real!” I said no I am faking being brave.
Thank you seriously from the bottom of my insecure depths for helping me change the image of myself. If I saw you and didn’t know you I would have thought you were beautiful without a bad thought in my head but when it comes to me I am programmed to think I should be smooth, toned, bone thin and forever young.
It is our actions that make us beautiful and you are actively BEING beautiful and you happen to have a beautiful body to boot. You are the image I want my daughter to grow up with and I am grateful you have inspired me to be body confident too. The more selfies and visuals we give social media the healthier societal standards will become.
I hope you write something for #BeReal your voice needs to be shared to the ends of the earth.
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You guys are seriously making me cry. Your beautiful words. Your support. Thank you. And I will definitely write for #BeReal.
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This piece is brilliant and beautiful and everything I love about you. You are a light. A beacon in a dark sky, and I and so many others gravitate to you because of it. Thank you for sharing this here. We love you and hope you’ll come back. Verra verra soon.
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Thank you. Thank you so much Mandi. ❤
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You fucking goddess, you.
You are radiant. You shine in a way that makes people want to be around you. I know, because I fell under your spell at BlogHer.
This post explains why. You live your life in the light. Thank you for letting me share your light this weekend. Now, we’re both radiant.
love,
Samara
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You are so beautiful, Samara. Thank you for letting me bask in YOUR light. Because you radiate goodness and beauty. You are wonderful.
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You’re so stretchy! I love your yoga poses and self confidence! You go girl!
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Aww thanks Don!
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Count me as one of your silent admirers Chrissy… Not just because you write, wear cool ass pants and are a yoga ninja, but because you do exude positivity and confidence and … not to steal from Sandy and Samara, but there is a light-ness about you.
Thank you for sharing your awesomeness here on SW, and thank you for not sitting under 7 layers waiting for some kind of plastic surgery fairy godmother (if only those were a real thing!) You’re badass and beautiful and your pictures and your words show that deep down you know that, even on the hard days. ❤
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Gretchen, thank you so much. You guys are making me all warm and fuzzy and stuff.
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Love, love, love this post. And I’m jealous of your suit. You look fantastic!!! xo
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Thank you, Andra! ❤
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*stands up*
*delivers slow-clap*
Brava, beautiful! Brava!
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*takes a bow*
Thank you so much.
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Being comfortable in my own skin has always been a goal of mine and most of the time I succeed in doing that but like everyone I have my days when I am too heavy for my height and I just want to hide away from everyone!!! Being short brings the fact of too much weight just looking even worse but I am who I am and I’m not about to change my body or my frame of mind for anyone!!! Thanks for being a voice and a visual for those of us who are still comfortable in our skin just not ready to share it with everybody!!
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That’s the best goal to have. Sometimes, it’s in knowing that we’re not alone that we progress.
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I have spent the vast majority of my life as the ‘chubby girl’ or ‘fat girl’ and it has taken me a long time to love me for me 🙂 Like you somedays (like today… and yesterday actually) I think I am fabulous and I am bouncy happy chick. Then there are the days I try to get into stockings and I tug them up over the cellulite and my bum and hips and think ‘finally’ then the second I breathe out ladders break out all over the place just like my face just before my period and then I leave my confidence at home and am screwed 🙂
I take solace in knowing that it is not just the chubby girls that have these insecurities, many of my friends suffer similar anxieties about the way they look even though I always thought they were model-worthy. I guess we all hate on ourselves for something 🙂
I truly LOVE your swimsuit by the way, it is rare they make such nice suits for us curvy gals and you are rocking it!
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I hate stockings so so so much! And yes, we all have these insecurities…and anyone who doesn’t is probably lying.
Thank you! I was pretty excited to find it!
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They are totally lying, or taking prescription medication hahaha. 🙂
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Chrissy, you rock that bikini like a BOSS. Good on ya!
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Thanks Vince! ❤
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You are perfect! Just the way you are. I love this so much I want to send you a pony. Thanks for sharing & inspiring the rest of Us.
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A pony!? Is that an option?
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