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I’m Offended That You’re Offended
I love a good joke. And by good joke, I mean a really bad one. One that defies all of the rules of polite society.
Inappropriate. Off color. Dark humor. I can’t believe he just said that.
Those jokes.
I love inappropriate humor.
In fact, I’m married to it.
It’s one of my favorite things about my husband. He is horribly, wonderfully inappropriate some times. He can wiggle out of just about any argument with a well placed joke. He’s always ready with a line or a quip that has some people choking on their drinks and others gasping in horror.
Me? I’m the neurotic people pleaser. I worry about hurting feelings, offending or upsetting people. Even people I don’t necessarily like. It’s ridiculous the amount of brain power and energy and time I spend worrying about this kind of shit.
But not him. He has freedom. He just goes for the funny, self righteous uptight busy bodies be damned.
And I’m so jealous of that.
I sit here and write every day. And every day I’m analyzing every. single. word. I’m terrified of what people will think. I’m paralyzed at the thought of offending someone.
I stay away from topics that are too controversial. I avoid cursing. I hold back. I dilute it. I white-wash my writing in political (and every other kind of) correctness. I only drop in an occasional foul word if it is to express deep pain or passion and no other word will suffice. But fuuuucck. It’s exhausting. (ohmygodohmygodohmygod)
The amount of thought I put into what not to write? It’s embarrassing. And I’m sick of worrying about it. I’m sick of worrying about what you think. Of what the nice lady down the street will think. What all the people who don’t even know I blog but may one day accidentally run across it think.
Fuuuuuccckkk.
Even here. On SisterWives. A place that invites, nay, encourages, real, raw, honest writing. Even here, my palms are sweaty because I just said fuck twice. (Shit, three times.)
What the hell is wrong with me?
Maybe that’s why I love inappropriate humor. Because it’s so far out of the realm of what I do and say. Because it’s a little freeing to laugh at it even if I’m not the one who said it.
I love raw humor, the kind that makes you question yourself for laughing. The kind that makes you think about the way you think. The kind that allows you to laugh at the absurd, the awful, the painful.
I love sarcasm. Hyperbole. Wit so dry my mouth turns to cotton. I love someone who can make me laugh, even when my heart is hurting.
I am in awe of people who do that freely. And I thank sweet little 7 pound 8 ounce baby Jesus for those people. (No disrespect meant to Jesus lovers.)
Those people have saved me. In my darkest moments I have been able to laugh. Sometimes it’s been my brother or sister. Sometimes my husband. Sometimes my closest friends. I have been in the depths of despair or in pain or just plain freaked out. And someone I know and love will drop in with a horribly inappropriate hilarious comment or observation and I am saved.
It’s kind of like when M’Lynn was crying hysterically at Shelby’s funeral? And Clairee shoves Weezer in front of her and tells her to punch Weezer in the face? And everyone erupts in laughter and M’Lynn goes from hysterical crying to hysterical laughter? That. That -only funnier- is what my people have done for me. (What? You’ve never seen Steele Magnolias? You’ve heard of Netflix, right? Get yerself some culture, ok?)
But then you have people that get pissed off. They find offense in someone else’s joke. They point out how that is hurtful to dogs/children//women/glutenites/religious people. Or insert any cause du jour. They have every right to not like it. To refuse to laugh. There have been plenty of jokes that have turned my stomach. But I don’t throw self righteous indignation on top of a steaming pile of shitty jokes. I walk away/ turn away/ look away.
Because there is always some topic that is too precious to laugh at. Always.I promise you. Nothing is safe from the harrumphs and the how dear theys. Eddie Murphy, Richard Pryor, George Carlin, Chris Rock, Louis CK. All of them left a sea of offended horrified people in their wake. Didn’t stop them.
And thank God.
Because some of us love dark humor. Some of us see the humor in the absurd. Some of us love that a really good joke calls you out on the very same b.s. that it is seemingly promoting. I need the fearlessly funny people in my life. The sharp witted, razor tongued rogues who bring the kind of laughter that I crave. Some of us don’t get off on your average “Guy walks into a bar” joke. (and by “get off” I mean laugh. C’mon, people.)
And aren’t you (you who get offended) tired of being so easily off’d? Isn’t it exhausting being riled up by every F-bomb and every joke that doesn’t meet some strict parameters of political correctness? Is it fun living life as the arbitrator of funny? Is it fun up on that high horse? (people on high horses are the one group I have no problem offending.)
I don’t think it is. I think that deep down you want to join in. You want to laugh too. And the best kind of laughter is when you can laugh at yourself. When you can trust that most jokes come from a place of entertaining and not harm.
*Disclaimer: Laughter at jokes is quite different from laughing with intent to hurt or demean. Belittling or shaming someone is different thing altogether. Someone looking to entertain is different from someone attempting to bully.
**What kind of asshole puts a disclaimer in the middle of a blog post?
Ugh. I’m so bored with it all.
I’m bored with worrying about it.
I’m bored with thinking about every fucking word I type.
I’m bored with grown ass adults who get injured by reading the word fuck.
Fuck fuck fuck. (Call it immersion therapy.)
I’m bored with self righteous indignation over jokes. Because (and this is the crucial part) they are JOKES.
And if this pisses you off, then I’m bored with you.
Because you’re trying to suck the fun out of humor. And that offends me. Humor is subjective. One person’s funny is someone else’s yawn. One person’s Oh my gawd! Is someone else’s Oh my. It is what it is. But what it isn’t is offensive.
You may not get it. You may not find it funny. That is totally fine. But you can’t police what other people find funny. You just can’t. Policing speech or humor is a dirty twisted road you don’t want to go down. It’s never ended well. Just ask all of North Korea.
So put on your big girl panties (says a staunch feminist) and suck it up when you hear someone crack a joke that doesn’t sit well with your delicate sensibilities.
Because I can’t afford to have watered down humor.
I need the dark side of funny.
I need to laugh and gasp at the same time.
I need the ice cold shock of unholy humor to get through life.
Life is a lot more fun when you don’t take things too seriously.
Life is hard and we could all use a good laugh.
It would be a lot more fun if we could all laugh together.
And if you don’t want to laugh with the rest of us?
Then I’m going to have to try really hard to not give a fuck.
Pingback: Warning: May Offend | Drifting Through My Open Mind
Well said! Excellent placement of foulities throughout!!
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Thank you! I’m glad my foulities were well dispersed! (Is foulities a word? If not, I love when people just make up words. I do it all the time!)
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As far as I know, “foulities” isn’t anything haha
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FRIST?
Oh YES! You are singing my song Gretchen. It doesn’t take more than two looks at my site to know that I stray on the side of safe sunshine and daisies. Writing my nice little posts while saying fuck in my head the entire time and envious of the writers who can do it with grace and perfection. Do I think any less of them because of dark humor or curse words? Hell no!
My best friend drops the F-bomb like she was born saying it and I’m so jealous. It makes me laugh and I know that she’s real and honest in her fuckedness. Turns out that I’m married to a man who does the same thing.
Thank you so much for putting this out there. I get it, I do! Will I change my own voice? Probably not – I’m too much of a an old, first-born, people pleaser to do so. BUT, I will continue to laugh at inappropriate humor and stand up for my friends who are able to deliver it.
Bravo girlie!! xo
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Thank you so much! And woo hoo! Frist! I think you just beat me to it over on Sandy’s blog! Yes, I won’t be gratuitously dropping F bombs on my own blog. I’m still constrained by my southern upbringing. That’s the great thing about this place! If you ever need to just unleash, come do it here! And I love to be around people who are uninhibited with their words and their humor. I get to live vicariously through them…
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Fuck yea! So, this guy walks into a bar. Dumb ass broke his nose.
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Ha! Well played Pattie, well played.
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(gretchen said fuck)
Look at Michelle! Fristing on sister wives!
As far as inappropriate humor goes….I think we all know where I stand on this spectrum. Fuck was my first word. Not really, but it might as well have been. And I love inappropriate humor so much I even mention it on my professional bio.
Laughter is everything. This is seriously one of my favorite things you’ve written, GKelly!!
Growing up, my brother and I would sneak out of our rooms late at night to watch Richard Pryor and Eddie Murphy concerts on HBO, while sneaking cigarettes out of my mom’s purse. We were eight. << hahah just kidding. But we were about 14yo. Ahhhh the teen years…..
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I know! I said Fuck! I’m such a little rebel!
So, I was kicking myself all week for choosing this topic. (I blame Briton.) But funny’s not really my thing. And I’m on this blog with the funniest women in blogging. And I think it’s a good idea to tackle humor? So yeah, I was stressing all week. This will never top your “In Mah Vag” post. Oh my god, one of the funniest things I’ve ever read. I might go read it again right now.
And weren’t you a naughty little deviant? Eddie Murphy and cigarettes… tsk tsk…
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Young pup, Beth. I went to an Eddie Murphy movie…in a theater! It might have even been a drive-in. It was raunchy – though, I can’t remember the name…
*picks up cane and shuffles away
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Hey! I went to a drive in once. I think my parents had me and my sister hide under a blanket in the back seat when they paid so they could save money. It was an Elvis movie if I remember right. *puts teeth back in and scratches ass*
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Bahahahaha!
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So much yes to this! I would dearly love it if we could all step away from our gasps of outraged indignation at every dippy little thing and just giggle it out. (Some people would be absolutely horrified at the things that get laughed at in this house…and that’s why those people don’t get to hang out here.) 😉
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Yes! I love it! My kids are definitely picking up on the humor my husband and I carry on with. And the cool thing is as they are getting older, they’re funny as hell! Very dry and witty. They don’t drop F bombs or anything (not in front of us at least) but it’s fun to watch their humor mature. And as for who hangs out at our house? A healthy and hearty and judgement free sense of humor is a requirement to get past the doorman for sure.
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ah a fellow subversive; great post to unwrap us all a little, Gretchen. If you haven’t seen or may have forgotten this scene from season 2 of the Wire, were there an Oscar for greatest use of the word fuck in a drama that has a major comedic impact this is it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dBexEtRFFnQ And keep swearing heartily and often. Very cathartic.
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A subversive? Yesss, I like that. I didn’t watch The Wire although I love most HBO series and I’ve heard that it was one of the best, ever. Are you British? For some reason I seem to remember that you were British. Swearing sounds SO much better with a British (or Irish) accent. Really, I should just adopt a cockney accent and then I will be free to swear heartily and often. No one would be offended! Brilliant idea! (and yes, it is cathartic!)
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Yep as British as warm beer and dodgy royalty. Splendid idea, the Germans always sound like they mean it when they swear, the French like it’s really too much effort but someone has to and the Italians swear with a gusto that is entirely unrestrained. So choose your mood and your accent and off you go! And the Wire is by the best 5 series I’ve watched in years.
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I just wrote a post yesterday on the inappropriateness of language in kids’ movies…however for adults I love it! I mean when you have a word that can be effectively used as all parts of speech, you’ve gotta respect that!
Your last line reminded me of a post I read a while back “The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck” by Mark Manson, so funny! I have the link if you want to read it (or you may know him, or find it on FB).
Thanks for being real.
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So, confession, I use foul language in front of my kids. Not all the time, but it has happened once. Or twice. Ok, ok… I affectionately call them “little shits” and they heard me say “fuck” when I backed into my husband’s car. BUT I don’t under any circumstances condone them using curse words. They are taught that what adults are allowed to do and what children are allowed to do are very different things. And I don’t drop the F bomb in front of other people’s kids. It’s up to the parents to corrupt their own kids, not me. (and yeah, if it’s a kid’s movie it should probably keep it clean)
I have read the Mark Manson post. It was brilliant! One of my favorites!
Thank you!
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Speaking as someone who offends on a regular basis without even trying….sing it, sister!!!
And also, pegging. 🙂
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Ha! Thank you! And thanks for putting up with my neurotic ridiculousness all week! And also, you don’t have to tell me every time you’re pegging. 🙂
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I see your point. But you must be very far removed from the battle grounds of high school, where everyone laughs at you for something (take, always worrying you look fat,) and it does hurt your feelings and it is bullying, but they’re all “God, can’t you take a joke? (Secretly we all just hate you. We’ve made that perfectly clear. We don’t pick on our friends. But this way, the blame’s not on us.)” Cause, man, that sucked.
It’s all about that trust you talked about.Comedians on TV, I trust. My cousin, I trust. My internet date who makes date-rape jokes all night? Not so much.
Ps. I don’t mean to lecture; I loved the article. I’ve just recently come into a period in my life where I can’t stop sharing my ideas. There’s no filter! Someone needs to validate them, or hear them, or let me know that I’m not invisible, mute, or talking to myself in a padded white room somewhere. I’m like an eight year old that can’t raise her hand and keeps shouting out in class!
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Here’s the thing. I have never laughed at people being mean. I despise it. It makes me want to hit/punch/kick someone real hard, in the balls or the ovaries. I hate it. And I hate when someone tries to discredit your feelings when you’ve been the victim of bullying or hate speech. I’m so so sorry this has happened to you. I don’t think that’s comedy. I think that’s some lame shit-head’s passive aggressive attempt at justifying bad behavior. And I completely understand why you may be a little gun shy about inappropriate humor. Totally.
Part of what inspired this post was some people I know in real life who are appalled if I mention a bit by Louis CK or some other funny comedian. They pass judgement on me for actually finding some of that stuff funny. And some people who have been put off by my husband’s humor (his humor is NEVER mean spirited or directed at any person). I get if people don’t find it funny but some of them act like we are evil for laughing or joking.
And you’re exactly right, it’s all about the context and the person who is saying it. You can’t just bust out an inappropriate joke with people you don’t know. Or a date making date rape jokes? That’s creepy as hell! (It was funny when I teased my husband about slipping me a Roofie, but only because he’s my husband.)
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Context is exactly right – there are comedians, and people that I simply can’t stand – it pisses me off when they tell a knock-knock joke, even if it’s hilarious. 🙂 I’m sure there are people who have drawn negative conclusions about me that respond to my sense of humor the exact same way.
I like to laugh more than I do just about anything else. But not at someone. And not at someone’s expense.
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You know what, Gretchen? The Great Cosmic Joke is that everybody is running around with their heads stuffed so far up their own asses, they don’t REALLY care what anyone else says.
They may *act* offended. It’s ephemeral. Then they go back to the real business of life, obsessing over themselves.
Go big or go home, girl! I love you. xoxox
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You are so right Samara! I think the acting offended ruse is all to elevate themselves. I mean, I get when someone’s been the butt of awful bullying and mean “jokes” that they may be sensitive. But they aren’t the ones I’m speaking to. It’s the people who just get all holier than thou. Ugh. Those people can kiss my ass.
Thank you my sweet, I will never be on your level of inappropriateness, but I will flirt with it every now and then. Mwah!
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The other side of the coin of mean bullying are the people who make passive aggressive barbs at you. In the public eye. Then pretend they’re just “kidding.”
I find that highly offensive, not just in the insult but in the cowardice. Call me out, but have some balls and stop pretending you’re joking.
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*wan smile* Eh, that’s a very blanketty statement, Precious xXx
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You might be right. I seem to come across very self absorbed people. Unfortunately.
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Another blanketty statement. That said, I know I CAN be self-absorbed, but not all the time 🙂
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A-fucking-men, Gretchen. I am so censored. Having a preacher daddy has made me question every single word, and what’s funny is I wrote a novel that people keep telling me is great, but the main character is dispicable and says fuck more than the, and I’m currently going through it and taking out some of the fucks in case my preacher daddy finds it and reads it one day, and I’m exhausted by it. Deep breath.
Jenny (inactive because of school sister wife) wrote a piece about writing free. I just need people to read free.
I love you more than my luggage, by the way.
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Mandi, I had no idea you were censored. You seem so free with your writing. And you’re hilarious and don’t hold back. I’m the only chicken shit Sisterwife here. And WHEN will I get to read this book of yours? Will I get an advanced release copy? Pretty please? *batting eyelashes*
When it comes to writing the book, that’s a whole other beast. I have a lot of people in real life who read my blog and (hopefully) one day they will read my book. And I am scared to death of what they might think! I WANT to write free. I do. But it’s so freakin hard. I remember Beth talking about that in one of her posts, but I didn’t read Jennie’s. I’m gonna have to go find it now and read it.
Thank you sista, I love you more than cheese. And wine. And white cheddar popcorn… now I’m hungry….
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I totally get this — I recently had a Cards Against Humanity party (if you haven’t played it, you should!) and I agonized over who to invite or not invite. On one hand, the game is hysterical — but terrible — incredibly un-PC — and I didn’t want to invite someone who might take it all too seriously and not get that IT’S A JOKE and be horribly offended! On the other hand, I didn’t want to offend anyone by NOT inviting them and then having them find out later from mutual friends or something. Next time, I’m just going to invite everyone and fuck ’em if they can’t take a joke.
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I LOVE THAT GAME! My favourite so far that we came up with was
Maybe she’s born with it…
…maybe it’s white privilege.
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Oh my god, that’s hilarious! Yes, I’m going to have to buy this game! We should do an on-line version of it and all play together!
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That would be AWESOME! I think there even IS an online version somewhere…
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Then we HAVE to do it! It would be so crazy! Now we just have to get everyone to agree on a time. (I’m serious, we are doing this!)
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Oh my god, I love your thought process! This is exactly what I would go through in that situation! I will see every angle in which someone may possible be offended! Isn’t it exhausting! I want to get to the point where I don’t care about those little things. Cause really, if they got offended at a game then I can’t stress about it. But this is so me! I’m feeling a little less normal every time one of you guys confesses to over-thinking this stuff too! (and I haven’t played it but I’m thinking I should…)
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I’ll admit that I can easily take offense of certain dark jokes. With some people, I am fine with it and I can even laugh too. My issue stems from how most people I met who use it are hurtful, meaningfully hurtful, and it made me uncomfortable because at this stage, it can be hard for me to tell whether they mean ill or just to entertain.
For a long while, I worked hard on not using foul language altogether, but I realized that every once in a while, it doesn’t hurt. I tend to worry if I use cussing online a lot, because I try to remain professional and positive all the time. Heck, I even worry when I share a post that has one (well used) curse word, even when I didn’t write it. I’ve grown a bit more comfortable about this over the past weeks though.
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I do stay away from a lot of cursing on my own blog. I feel like I’ve set a certain tone there and to deviate dramatically wouldn’t be good. Plus, I worry about offending people, obviously. That’s why I saved this type of post for Sisterwives! I love having a place I can go to the darker side without worrying about judgement. I don’t cuss like a sailor or anything, but I am also trying to just be me and to stop all the self editing. I do it in writing and in real life. I’ve been doing it my whole life, on many levels. That being said, I will never use foul language in most public situations. It really is when I’m by myself (cause I’m clumsy and hurt myself a lot) or with my close friends and family.
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Basically my life. I’m sharing this.
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Thank you! I’m honored that you would share this!
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Great post! 🙂
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Reblogged this on Fits of Wit and commented:
There’s a thin line between being a master of inappropriate humor and being seen as insensitive.
I had to share this post written by Gretchen Kelly on The Sisterwives because she hits the nail on the head.
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There was a recent conversation about something related to this in the Star Wars fandom on Twitter. A SW author tweeted a picture (it was a cool picture, actually: https://twitter.com/ChuckWendig/status/580791347252224000), but it had the words “May the Force be with you. Unless you like the prequels. Then you can go and jump off a bridge.” I honestly don’t find this funny at all. The author eventually stated that he tweeted it because he liked the image, not the message. I’m a prequel fan, so I’m offended that the app creator would incorporate that into the app and use suicide as part of the joke. Some people think I’m reading too much into it, but it’s written plainly “go and jump off a bridge.” I don’t like dark humor and I never saw a need for it, but that’s my preference. That said, I find it disrespectful that someone would make a joke like that. Okay, you don’t like the prequels, fine. But why go the extra mile and target a specific audience and then go tell them to jump off the bridge just because that’s what they like. I just wanted to know your take on that.
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I have to say, it doesn’t offend me. I don’t find it funny. I don’t think it’s very clever. I think it’s in poor taste. But it doesn’t offend me. I have laughed at some jokes made about very painful situations that I have endured myself, but if they were clever and funny, I had no problem laughing at them. But, I happen to like dark humor. It definitely doesn’t appeal to everyone.
The “jump off a bridge” joke is lame and dumb in my opinion. It also sounds like this is a heated division in SW fandom (I don’t know, just assuming) and perhaps there was some vitriol behind this joke. Usually when there is anger behind the joke that is a big turn off for me also…
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So first, you pretty much described me to a tee when describing yourself. Second, this post was hilarious, so you ARE funny. Three, people who take life too seriously REALLY irritate me. The older I get, the less I give a shit about stupid stuff. (OH MY WORD. YOU JUST GOT ME TO CUSS.) If you can’t laugh at life, you can’t sit at my fucking table. (WHAT IS GOING ON HERE????)
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Oh my word, I don’t think I’ve ever heard such vile words coming from you Kelly! hehehe… you know we are sistahs from another mistah. Or something like that… I know I phrased it once on your blog and I can’t remember! Damn you mommy brain! (I blame my kids for my bad memory, not all the funny cigarettes I smoked in college) Simpatico? No that wasn’t it… I will be trolling your blog comments at 2am tonight trying to find that effin comment!
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I am married, no, not married but might as well be, too the most inappropriate, loud man on the planet, or so I thought. When it comes to off colour anything it is like he feeds off it. I can’t believe how much I relate to this post. although, I have started to not give a fuck, I think that comes with age, and what life has thrown at me.
Great post
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I’m getting there Darla. I’m starting to not give a fuck. Writing this had me all nervous and stressed and illustrated perfectly that I still have a looooong way to go. But, oh, how I love a funny man. To me humor is the sexiest thing EVER.
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I am a profound swearer and proud! I occasionally get told off by my partner but he knows that’s just how I express myself when I’m passionate about something. I think if I didn’t let it out with a profanity I might explode. Maybe that’s why Muslims are blowing up, not because of terrorism but because they’re not allowed to swear?! #mindblown #apologisestoanyoneoffended #fuckit
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Hahaha! You went there, didn’t you? You are fearless, aren’t you? I’m in awe right now. I know some profound swearers, they have no filter. They will drop a fuck in front of children, at church, wherever. They don’t even realize it until people react with shock. I can’t even imagine speaking that freely in every situation without a care! Eventually I’m sure I’ll get there. When I’m 95 years old I’ll be dropping f bombs all over the place…
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I like to dance on the line of appropriate. I’m definitely censoring myself to a point on my blog, but not so much that I completely remove myself. And not without constant worry of people not taking a joke/rant/eyc. The other day I posted about hating on Jamberry groups and I’m still terrified of backlash from friends and readers who love Jamberry.
That being said, I can’t stand offensive humor in the work place. I may not be offended, but if other people are, I will fight like hell to make it stop.
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I do feel like my voice on my blog is me. I mean, I’m pretty polite and mild mannered in real life. I just don’t show the other side of me to the whole world. And if anything I flirt a little with inappropriateness, just to test the waters. Like you said, dance on the line.
But seriously, would people get upset over you not liking Jamberry? Are those the nail wrap thingies? Is there like some kind of gang war or rivalry going on in the cosmetic nail art world that I’m not aware of?
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Honestly, I don’t even know…I just tend to avoid rants for fear of offending people and I ranted, so I worried!
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Well I like to think that I do all sides of funny, but I will not sit around and read naughty words… that is just too much!
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I’m sorry Art! You’re right. It was too much… I hope you’re ok. Please don’t hold it against me.
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HA! I was in the Navy when I was 17… I can swear like a sailor.
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G, I think I love you. Asshole 🙂
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Aw, that is the sweetest thing anyone’s ever said to me! I love you too biatch! ❤
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*grins* If you’re making me your biatch, don’t let my BW know… 😉
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Fuck is actually one of my favorite words. I have a very dark sense of humor, adore sarcasm, and have a teeny tiny filter that I often forget to use and I manage to offend people all of the time. Especially in my husband’s family. Which is strange because he is inappropriate as all get out and people fucking LOVE him! Anyway, I applaud your liberation! I’m not offended in the least and I adore the disclaimer midway through. You may have just started a new blogging trend.
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Fuck is just a really satisfying word to say. I don’t know if it’s because it’s forbidden or if it’s because it’s the perfect combination of sounds and has a good emphatic sound to it… but it is one of my favorite words. Only I mutter it under my breath to myself a lot. You know, so as to not offend others. But I’m feeling a little more bold after writing this, I may start saying it out loud! And I knew I loved you, but now that I know you have no filter? My heart just grew two sizes…
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Fuck, that was a great post!
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Fuck, that is a great compliment! Thank you Briton!
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This nice lady across the street says, fuck ’em if they can’t take a joke!
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Bahahaha! You are awesome Jen! Now I think I need to bake you cookies or something..
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HA!! Seriously, people are way too sensitive! Like you, I overthink and then find myself holding my tongue sometimes. Some people think I am quiet, but sometimes it is more that I am trying to figure out the “right” way to say it or I know I will get that look (you know the one). I live for the inappropriate and the warped.
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The only good thing about getting old (other than the incurable hot-ness, of course, haha) is that the filter is completely gone. I say pretty much what I want to,anytime, anywhere, to anyone, and screw everybody if they don’t like it. On a completely unrelated note, I haven’t had a girlfriend in x number of years.
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That is an awesome comment TTD! You need to find you a good woman who isn’t offended by a real talking man! That’s the one thing I look forward to about getting older, not giving a shit about what people think. I would have thought that would have happened by the age of 42, but hey, gives me something to look forward to right?
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Thanks for your kind words. I’m not quite at the “I’m older and have more insurance” phase, but almost. Here’s to us all having great things to look forward to.
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The absence of fucks to give is a glorious thing.
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Are you completely void of fucks Scott? I’m so jealous…
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Haha. Not completely. But my fucks are reserved for those worthy of them. I hand them out sparingly.
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Immersion Therapy…..I love that. Let’s sit these people down with some Richard Pryor and educate the FUCK out of them on what is funny old school like!!! And there is nothing wrong with “A guy walks into a bar….” jokes as long as they take either a dark or a very dirty left turn and leave jaws dropped. Half in ghastly surprise, and half in laughter! Keep laughing friend.
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Thank you JMC (is that what I should call you?) I think that’s a brilliant idea, Richard Pryor immunotherapy. I love it. The crazy thing is all the greatest moments in comedy are the ones that are shocking and unexpected and dark. Some of Saturday Night Live’s best early stuff was very controversial. If they’d played it safe they wouldn’t be on the air 40 years later. And Pryor, Murphy, Carlin, they’re all legends, right? So it’s not like we’re degenerates for liking this humor. And I have heard a few good “Guy walks into a bar” jokes. I couldn’t tell you what they are because I have a horrible memory but I know I’ve heard some dark twisted versions…
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Yup. And Please call me John. May I call you Gretchen? I totally agree with you on the classics. Carlin especially. Also the original “Not ready for prime time players” SNL cast.
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You may find this to be shocking, but I actually tone my shit down online because I don’t feel like listening to all the bullshit you mention (eloquently by the way) above.
I’m myself in real life and there are very few things that are off limit. My wife often marvels at how I haven’t been punched in the face for half the shit I say. “It’s all in the delivery!” Lol. Or something. I’m on your side. I don’t like people being bullies, but we can joke about things in a way that isn’t hurtful to everyone.
I watched a video of a Golden Retriever dropping food his owner was throwing at him the other day, probably 15 times. It was hilarious! There were tons of people calling it abuse and I wanted to drag my nuts across all of their faces because they’re wrong and can’t take a joke. It was funny, people! Don’t be a fucker!
Okay, I lost my train of thought, but great post!
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That should be the punishment for people trying to ruin our fun. They get to have Don’s nuts drug across their face. Thank you Don! Having your endorsement and permission to carry one with the inappropriateness is all the motivation I need. 🙂
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You are so right on the money, Gretchen. And some people tend to forget that humor isn’t always just about getting a laugh; sometimes it’s a way oif making a point by catching people off guard, or using humor to create a moment of pause in a way that doesn’t immediately put people on the defensive. We may not agree on a certain subject, but if we can laugh together about it, then there is a dialogue that opens as opposed to staying shut.
And you’ll notice I didn’t say “shit” or “fuck” one time in that whole paragraph…
Loved this post, Gretchen 😉
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I’m going to erase my entire post and just replace it with your comment. You just said exactly what I was trying to say. But I’m going to leave a few fucks in there cause I need the release.
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Hahaha! Definitely leave them — It just shows you give a fuck. Or a few 😉
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And that last sentence sounded really dirty… Oops! I didn’t mean it that way…
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I’m glad you cleared that up… I was SOOO offended!
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My 6 year old son is a little uptight and a rule follower so I taught him why the planet Uranus is so funny. Once I explained what an anus is, I told him that he should ask his kindergarten teacher, “Do you like Uranus?” He turned 50 shades of red but I could see a sense of freedom open up in him. It was so fun to see him grasp a clever joke (barely a step above a fart joke, but still clever). I’m like you Gretchen. I love dark humor, sarcasm and a good dirty joke but censoring myself comes naturally to me. But being able to see the humor in things has saved me more than once!
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Awesome. And totally true. Keep on bringing the swear words and cringe-inducing laughs. That’s why I’m here in the first place lol 🙂
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